November 10, 2021

Dear Vespertine #2 - Toy Envious

By Danielle Ferguson
Dear Vespertine #2 - Toy Envious

Dear Toy Envious, 

This question is a common one at Vespertine and comes from long-term and new couples alike. Introducing new things may require starting slowly so both of you will feel comfortable.  

It’s important to let your partner know that there are many ways to express sexuality and sensuality and not all require a partner. A toy can be a supplemental tool and can facilitate a more pleasurable experience for both partners. Communication is going to support a healthy experience and we have some fun, lighthearted games that can break the ice and help initiate those conversations. 

Perhaps both of you can come into our shop and we can help you choose something that would be fun and interesting to both of you. We welcome partners as well as solo customers. You can also choose to shop from the privacy of your home on our website. Many of our customers have shared that browsing together has sparked great conversations with their partners. We also offer many educational books on a spectrum of intimacy topics.

Another idea is to consider a toy that is not anatomically correct. We have many toys at our store that can be enjoyed by both partners and are not designed for a specific body type. “Pom” by Dame is a great example and one of our most popular products. Designed by women, it’s cute, soft and small and is designed to massage erogenous zones. We recommend Pom to beginners because it is user-friendly and affordable. Lastly, it can be beneficial for each of you to experiment with products alone first and then introduce what you have learned to each other with greater confidence. 


Do YOU have a question? We want to hear from you!

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*This series is designed to entertain and inform - not provide medical advice. You should always consult your doctor when it comes to your physical health

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